April 24, 2007
Garden Footwear Review
While I decide whether or not to take GardenRant up on their very kind offer of free Sloggers, I thought it best if I review what I already have. Being ‘green’, I want to make sure that I’m not engaged in mindless consumerism or becoming a slave to the gardening fashionistas.
| Aldo Sandals | Fake ‘Merrells’ | K-Mart Sneaks | |
 |
 |
 |
|
| Description: | Son’s locker room wear during ‘01-’02 hoops season | Impulse buy from Walmart clearance bin circa 2003. |
6 months of office attire before called for garden duty |
| Price: | No clue | $12 | $19 |
| Off/On: | No bending involved. | Requires finger at the heal standing on one foot. |
Requires socks, knots — what a hassle. |
| ‘Puttering’: | Perfect | OK | Too much work to put on |
| Shoveling: | Ouch | Light digging | Pogo in tight soil |
| Mowing: | Too slick | Eh | Perfect |
| Snow: | Dusting to 1″ | Up to 3″ | Up to 6″ |
| Temperature: | > 25F | > 10F with socks | Down to -10F |
| Smell factor: | Funky but cleans up nicely | Amorphophallus in flower | Biohazard |
| Other uses: | Walking the dogs, ‘visiting Quito’ | Considered evening wear in Ithaca | Rodent repellent |
Filed under Bummers by on Apr 24th, 2007. Comment. 
Leave a Comment
Pings on Garden Footwear Review
Comments on Garden Footwear Review
Craig, that is outstanding! Way better than Consumer Reports. And a word about real Merrell’s – the overpriced pair I have started falling apart at the seams within 6 months – No shit!! It’s fakes for me from now on. (Even if I weren’t cheap, which I am.)
Nicely done.
This MIGHT BE the greatest blog post ever posted.
Hank
LOL!!!!
This just settles my opinion. Lawn hazards or not, I’ll stick with my bare feet. *grin*
Hilarious! Hmm….you’ve got all the basic garden uses covered. What would you use the Sloggers for? Besides just flat-out fashion, of course….
Craig,
This is the first post that I’ve ever smelled.
Julie
Julie: I’ll take that as a compliment. I guess.
Colleen: They’d be good for really dressy occasions in this funky town — weddings, funerals, graduations etc.
This is hilarious – and extremely well-done. You could get this into a peer-reviewed journal I think.
I could send you biohazard signs for the sneakers. We’re approved as a BSL-2 facility…hmmm. Those shoes might get you up to a BSL-3 level.
Craig: I think there is a mouse in those K Mart tie ups! I think you big win was very timely and no one needs those sloggers more than you!!! LOL
Sharp eyes Layanee. That’s actually a leaf. Biohazards are relegated to the porch all winter, which is a veritable leaf eddy. I did once live in a house where the mice would steal dog food and fill my boots with kibbles.
And Pam: I’ll ship the sneaks to you when they reach BSL-3. Your students might make some amazing discoveries culturing them.
Good god. Take the sloggers.
I agree with Susan — I have a pair of Merrells, and they’re literally the worst shoes I’ve ever owned. I spent almost as much on insoles to try to make them wearable as I did on the shoes. No forefoot cushioning at all.
They make my feet hurt even when all I do is walk around the garden. Feh.
I’m looking forward to the Sloggers. I jam my feet into a pair of LL Bean gum boots just because they’re handy.
Sweat pants and gum boots: the height of Maine fashion!
hahaha- my gardening shoes have become every pair of shoes that I own that I will wear in the summer, sandals included. My husband freaks out when I wear sandals when using a shovel, but hey, I like to live dangerously!
Great post!
Loved your garden shoe review!
I have a similiar collection, but must admit I own a pair of Sloggers clogs – got them in spring 07 for half off. They’ve become my garden shoe of choice, easy on and off, sturdy and can hose ‘em off. (yeah I know, I sound like an ad for Sloggers.)
Except for serious digging, then I get out the steel shank boots. Learned that one the hard way.
Very nice! Even grosser than my gross Birkis!